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headed into the mall to grab an ice cream. Finally, they
decided to head back home. In the car, Scott's mood
remained cheerful. "That was fun. I needed to blow off some
steam."
As they drove down Route Nine, heading back east
towards Cambridge, Derek felt a warm sense of satisfaction in
his chest. He reached over and took Scott's hand in his. Scott
twined their fingers together, lifted Derek's hand to his mouth
and gave it a soft kiss, then lowered it into his lap, holding it
there. They drove, contentedly in silence, listening to music.
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Wrestling With Desire
by D.H. Starr
The next day, when they got their grades in history class,
Derek's heart fell. He had received three A's and two B's. It
wasn't his grades that bothered him. He knew that his
parents would be happy. It was Scott's grades that concerned
him. He had received all A's except for calculus. He received a
B- in that class. As they left the school saying their goodbyes
to their friends, Scott's mood dampened, becoming as cold as
the weather outside. Sitting in his car outside Scott's house,
he wished there was something he could do to brighten the
moment. He wouldn't be seeing Scott for ten days and didn't
want his last moment with him to be like this.
Turning to Scott, he spoke using a gentle voice. "I'm
gonna miss you. Promise that we'll talk at least once a day."
Scott leaned over, placing his hand on the side of Derek's
face and curling his fingers behind Derek's neck. Pulling him
in, Scott closed the distance between them and kissed him
with warm tenderness. The wetness from the inside of his
mouth slicked over Derek's lips creating a seal between them
as their tongues intertwined. Derek loved their slow sweet
kisses, but this particular kiss had a feeling of longing and
desire that he hadn't felt before. It felt like Scott needed this
kiss and wouldn't let it go. After a few minutes, Scott
reluctantly drew his head back and held Derek in a silent
gaze. "I'm going to miss you too. More than you can
imagine."
* * * *
The first few days of winter break dragged longer than
Derek could have imagined. Not only did he miss Scott
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by D.H. Starr
terribly, used to seeing him every day, but Scott hadn't
called. Derek called frequently and kept getting forwarded to
his voicemail. A mixture of real worry and extreme anger
soured his mood. His parents asked him a few times what
was wrong, but they had no idea that he and Scott were in a
relationship, or that he was gay for that matter, so it would
sound odd to start complaining that a boy hadn't called him in
a few days. Instead, he just grumpily claimed that nothing
was wrong and went to the attic to listen to music.
After dinner on Christmas Eve, Derek was unable to
contain the thoughts that kept him in his surly mood and
decided to call Beck. Being Jewish, she was one of his few
friends who was always free from family obligations around
the winter holidays. "Hey Beck. I'm about ready to throw my
mixing board out the window. Can we get together?"
Beck had called him each day to find out if he had talked
to Scott. Derek's proclamation made the question
unnecessary at the moment. "Sure babe. Let's meet up at
The Syrian Wrap in Central Square. Half an hour sound good
to you?"
"Sure. I'll see you there."
A half an hour later, Derek and Beck were sitting at a table
by the window, watching last minute Christmas shoppers
trudge through the snow and slush. Derek had ordered a chai
tea and a chicken Caesar wrap. Beck had opted for a double
mocha and a barbeque chicken wrap with extra hot sauce.
Dipping one end of her wrap into the blue cheese dressing
that came with her meal, she took a large bite and surveyed
Derek. A dollop of blue cheese had pasted itself to the corner
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of her mouth and was beginning to drip towards her chin.
"Okay. Just start talking and don't stop until you get it all out.
I will, in my superior manner, sort through your feelings for
you when you are finished."
Derek smiled weakly, but was grateful for the chance to [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]